I decided to base my own monologue on the assessment piece that we did in class as I found the techniques in that monologue useful and easily applied in my own monologue...The use of empathy in the assessment piece to Jackie and Rose is very well done by the author as he tries to convey sorrow and regret in his monologue to convince the reader that Jackie is sorry for her actions and that she wants to make amends.
A guy called Dave has just found out his GCSE results and is thinking back a year or 2 ago when he could have worked harder, and he is wondering what will happen now that he has failed all of his exams.
Dave: F**k my life! (Frowns in disgust as he stares at his own reflection) Why did I not work? Why did I not try? Why did I not concentrate? WHY? (Pause) If only I had been one of those kids that cared about school and tried in lessons...(Ponders while he looks up at the sky) People used to make fun of me when I was younger for not being as bright as everybody else, even my teachers! People would often judge me because of my background. So what if both my parents are un-employed and are on benefits? They're not the ones that don't know what it is like to have two drunks for parents. (Desperately angrily worried) I WANTED to try, but I just could not be bothered, as I spent all those hours 'Owt and Abowt' having fun with my life rather than wondering and caring about anything else. (Slight pause) I did not think about the consequences of not working; my parents used to push me hard but as my mum said to me this morning, "no matter what your grades are we will still be very proud of you" (Smiles irresistibly) - Yes proud of a failure, what will become of me now? No college will take me up. No school will take me back. No employer will take me on. Mum... what will become of me? ...
Some good characterisation. Lok at how stage directions introduce scenes: they don't interpret, they just describe. You use the moment of pride well as he recalls his mother's words and there is a start contrast in his next words that works beautifully, but you cannot use the phrase from the style model "smiles irresistibly" as this would count as plagiarism - what phrase could convey the same expression/emotion to an actor trying to play the character? Who is the audience - is this a social comment piece, like Keatley's? Try and make the character's experience one that feels somehow unique but also conveys the class struggle.
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